Known Johnson

May 27, 2006

Events transpiring Wednesday evening, with a preface set today

Filed under: General — Tom @ 12:26 pm

One week in on my (the drug I take for my migraines which begins in “Top” and ends in “amax,” written this way because of damn bots spamming my comments) and one side-effect has definitely kicked in: I’ve lost 4 pounds doing absolutely nothing. Very weird. I know it affects your appetite and all, but I really haven’t changed how I eat all that much. I do feel a lot less hungry, so maybe I’m just snacking a lot less. What I have definitely changed is what I drink: soda is out for the most part, replaced by water, lots and lots of water. The reason is two-fold. One, this stuff dehydrates you, so I need to make sure to keep a lot more water in me than usual. Second, and really weird, it makes soda taste flat and sometimes even acidic. It was almost immediate – I popped open a can of my usual morning Diet Coke last Saturday, just over 12 hours after taking the first dose, and it already tasted odd. At different times throughout the week, the few times I’ve had soda, it has tasted flat and sometimes very sharp, but never did it taste normal. I guess if I have to give up something . . . let it be soda. And weight.

Let me tell you about Wednesday night. I’ve been meaning to get around to this for two days now. Wednesday night, in a simple phrase, blew chunks. We had planned on Alissa bringing pizza home and getting settled in to watch the big Lost finale at 8, but I got a call at 6:30 and she was stuck at Costco after she got gas with a dead battery! I had known this day would come – her battery had been acting weird, causing her car to start sluggishly, but you don’t just up and replace a battery until it dies. So we waited. And waited. And waited – and somehow that battery got almost an entire extra year from the time I figured it was going to die (late last summer, right around the time Amanda was due to arrive in the world, in fact.) I just didn’t figure this day would come today.

They sell batteries at Costco but strangely don’t install them, so I had to go do it. It’s not a hard job – two bolts on a bracket hold it in, then the one bolt on each battery terminal, remove the battery, and do the reverse. A five minute job – absolutely not worth paying someone to do. At that very moment, however, I was in the middle of feeding Amanda, so Alissa had to find someone to help get her moving at least to get her out of the pump area. Well, since she was stuck at the pump and no one around her had jumper cables, a couple people attempted to help push her car, but the transmission locks in some situations and she had to call me to figure out how to unlock it (which, obviously, slowed me down leaving.) She got it moved, but in doing so they pushed it into a pole and now she has big scrapes on her front bumper. A minor thing, but just one more thing on top of the battery. She lucked out when some guy helped jump her so she could actually move and have AC, so I had her drive around the side near where the entrance was so I could get in and out easily with the battery.

Finally I got there, got the battery, and got in line behind a lady with a cart full of crap. I’m standing there with this 50lb. battery in my arms thinking “she’s going to let me go, right?” and she turns around, looks at me and sees the battery, seems to acknowledge the burden, and just when I think she’s going to offer to let me jump in front of her, she goes right back to loading the conveyor belt with her shit – a collection of practically every item the store sells, it seemed. Really, what would it have taken out of her day to let the guy with the ONE item, the ONE VERY HEAVY item go ahead of her?

I eventually got through the line, then got the battery in about 7:30, got the pizza, and got home at 7:58. We already had Lost set to record because I knew not to trust something like that to chance, and it was good I set it because Amanda was still up and needed to eat and go to bed after we ate, so we didn’t even get to start watching until after 8:30. While eating pizza I made the mistake of drinking Diet Coke, which I hadn’t had any of since noon the day before. Going a day without soda is very unusual for me. I shouldn’t have been surprised at my body’s reaction to caffeine when I had it after a day without: I couldn’t fall asleep! That is my luck.



  1. They have shopping carts at Costco… she probably thought, “Why in the world is he lugging around that heavy ass battery when he could’ve placed it in a cart?”

    Comment by Bekah — May 30, 2006 @ 10:12 am | Reply

  2. It was you, wasn’t it?!

    Comment by Tom — May 30, 2006 @ 12:38 pm | Reply

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