Known Johnson

June 22, 2006

Haiku by two

Filed under: General — Tom @ 12:09 pm

Haiku giant cat head (for a birthday card)

One giant cat head
Made of many cat pictures
Means “happy birthday.”

Haiku cream cheese warning

No cream cheese warning
I put it on my bagel
I wanted butter.

True story. I wanted a bagel this morning and I hate cream cheese. I toasted my bagel and saw a large vat of slightly yellowy stuff that I assumed was a lightly yellow butter. So if you find yourself asking, “Hey, self, is it a massive vat of light-colored butter or just yellowy cream cheese?” It’s cream cheese. It’s just a general rule I’m going to apply from now on.

And no, I didn’t eat the cream-cheesed bagel. I actually bought two friggin’ bagels – I threw the one away. Yes, I am a good person. I probably could have left the befouled one on the counter and pretended I knew nothing about it, but I’m just not that way. Sometimes we have to pay for the lessons we learn in life, even dumb ones about butter and cream cheese.

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2 Comments »

  1. It is completely beyond my comprehension that somebody could hate cream cheese.

    Comment by Chris — June 25, 2006 @ 10:39 am | Reply

  2. This is just part of my feminine intrigue, Chris.

    Comment by Tom — June 25, 2006 @ 11:21 am | Reply


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